Me. At least after what I've been through.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
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It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
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