My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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