they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
only if we run a train.
done.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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