I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
I just gift wrapped bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
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