HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
