You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Fuck appropriateness.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Randomize
