It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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