at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
