The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
You've changed since you got that strap on
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Randomize