If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
