You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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