I like to think it a success when the cops are called
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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