marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
