So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I'm just crazy horny about you
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
