guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
