Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Randomize
