What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
