I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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