Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
