Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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