she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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