Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
