check it out our google latitudes are spooning
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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