the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
