it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
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