The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
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I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
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Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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