Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
