did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Randomize
