i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
