Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
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You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
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His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
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