How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
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