based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Randomize
