4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
More tranny stories later!
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize