North Korea, Best Korea!
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
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