pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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