I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
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