a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
