i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
