both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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