Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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