I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Betty ford says i'm here all night
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
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