Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
