I think im going to throw up on grandma
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
