I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Randomize
