He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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