I think I died a long time ago.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Randomize
