this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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