chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
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