Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
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