CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Randomize
